Hitman Review

Hitman Poster\

Rated: R

Running Time: 100 minutes

Year: 2007

Boobs: 1 Pair

One Sentence: Most white men should not shave their head bald.  

Video game movies, are like this whole other genre of movies.  They are usually horrible, have a lacking plot that is the sub plot of the combination of many games in a series, and real life creations of video game people almost never seems to work out,yet they keep on making them.  So in theaters now, and placing 4th in the box office this last weekend was Hitman.  A movie based on the video game of the same name.  I will let you guess which of the things listed above are included in this movie.  I will give you a hint, ALL OF THEM.

Timothy, what are you doing, you were the bad guy in Die Hard 4, did you have to shave your head?  You look like a cupie doll in a suit with guns.  You are not threating in anyway, you are more like a confused metal patient that is trying to kill people and should be locked up.  You moves are not that smooth, and while some of your kills are worthy of the hitman name, the rest was just kind of all over the place.  

With all my ranting however, if i placed this up against House Of The Dead and Bloodrayne, this movie is Oscar worthy.  It maintains its thin plot points, has a sexy Russian girl, and while it was not precision assassin killing, the action was good, and kept me entertained.  It is defiantly on the better side of the Video Game movie genre, but I wouldn't say go see it in the theater.  Fanboys add it to your queue, it's not good enough for the 8 bucks. 

3 Stars

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